


Make Me Whole

by Kitkat_pro



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), BAMF Aziraphale (Good Omens), Beating, Blood, Blood and Injury, Blow Jobs, Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Depression, Flesh eating, Forced Feeding, Hurt Aziraphale (Good Omens), Hurt/Comfort, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens), M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mind Manipulation, Oral Sex, Pain, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Crowley (Good Omens), Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Revenge, Sex, Tenderness, Top Crowley (Good Omens), Torture, Wing Grooming, Wing damage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:22:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24094282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitkat_pro/pseuds/Kitkat_pro
Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley finally find love, but for how long. Heaven and hell need to make an example. Aziraphale is taken and tortured. Crowley tries his best to reach him in time.Crowley must do what he can to Make Aziraphale whole again. He needs to know what happened to the love of his life.Please pay attention to tags.explicit Sex in first chapter - First chapter is longTorture in second, third and fourth chapters.First & Second chapter beta read and edited by Dellashesakillerqueen beta reader after that.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 54
Kudos: 133





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Caution
> 
> Following chapter contains explicit M/M sex

It had been one year since the end of the world didn’t happen. Aziraphale and Crowley had settled into a routine of eating, drinking and enjoying each other's company. There had been slight brushes of hands and pining looks, but they both still told themselves that the other wouldn’t want them as anything more than a friend. They were both so insecure in who they were,and too scared to destroy what they had. 

Aziraphale wiped his mouth, yet again enjoying another meal at the Ritz “That was scrumptious. Back to the shop dear?”

Crowley brought his eyes up from Aziraphales lips to his eyes. “Mm, yeah sounds good.” He snapped his fingers and the bill was paid. 

“Would you like to walk or take the Bentley, Dear?” 

“Why don’t we walk, the fresh air would be good.”  
They walked out of the restaurant and headed down the street.

“Do you think we’re safe?” asked Aziraphale looking at his feet tugging at his waist coat. Wrinkles appearing at the side of his eyes in worry.

Crowley looked at him and wrapped an arm around his shoulder. “I think we are safe for now Angel.”

Aziraphale rested his head against Crowley's shoulder and let himself relax. He needed this, it felt right. Crowley felt right, he felt like home. He wanted desperately to come home; never in his life had he felt like he’d had a home. Heaven was all cold and formal, but Crowley was all soft, and warmth and love. He felt like a warm tender hug.

“Crowley, do you ever think of... mortal needs?”

Crowley looked down at his friend and quirked his eyebrow.

“I am wondering if you ever think about pleasures of the body?” Aziraphale pressed, looking at Crowley out of the corner of his eye, coyly smirking at his demon.

Crowley gaped, unsure what he should say. Yes he thought of sex, he thought of it with the most beautiful being on the planet. He wanted desperately to touch and taste the love of his life. He wanted to see that wonderful look of love coming from Aziraphale as he lightly touched him.

“Ngk. Yeah. Um, there have been times that I have thought about it,” He had dreamed of it everyday he had been on earth, “but it was only ever thoughts.” It could only ever be in his thoughts. He brushed it off, trying to be cool.

“Oh, I see.” Aziraphale sounded disappointed.

“Why do you ask Angel?”

Aziraphale brought his head up and looked at Crowley's eyes through his dark lenses, his own eyes filled with such desire.

“I was wondering if maybe we could try it together, you know, to see what it’s like. To maybe see what the fuss is about. Maybe. I don’t know. Actually, never mind. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Aziraphale pulled away and started worrying, fidgeting with his hands and tugging at the bottom of his waist coat, avoiding making eye contact with Crowley. He had drawn in on himself, worried that he had just ruined everything.

Crowley just stared at his paramour, not believing his ears.

“You want to wot?” 

Aziraphale’s eyes shot up, startled. He clambered for a moment before he caught his words.

“Well dear, since we have known each other for so long, and I do care for you as more than just a friend, I was wondering if we could engage in some carnal pleasures. You must know that I care deeply for you, that honestly, dear, I love you. I want to show you just how much I love you. This is not going as I had planned. I’ve really buggered this up, haven’t I? I had wanted this to be romantic…” He was cut off by Crowley's hand firmly gripping his chin.

“Shh, shh Angel. Just take a minute to breathe.” He tipped his Angels head up so their eyes met. “Are you sure this is something that you want”

Aziraphales eyes sparkled.”Oh yes, Dear, please. I need to know what it’s like to come home.”

Crowley tugged Aziraphale forward as desire exploded within him. His Angel wanted him. His Angel needed him. His Angel wanted to bed him. He was not going to let this chance slip him by. The door to the shop flung open as they approached and slammed shut behind them, locking as it should.

Aziraphale was struck dumb, unsure what to make of Crowley’s reaction. He was shocked and confused right up until Crowley grabbed him and spun him around.

Crowley’s fingers curled into his collar causing Aziraphale to thud against the wall, one hand on his throat and the other lifting his hands above his head. Aziraphale let out a sharp gasp as his eyes went wide. Crowley turned Aziraphale’s head with his thumb on his jaw, then leaned in and drew his forked tongue up the side of his angel's pale soft neck. He nipped the bottom of Aziraphale’s earlobe and Aziraphale let out a deep pleading moan. 

“Is this what you wanted Angel?” 

Aziraphale whimpered. 

“I need you to tell me Angel. Is this what you want.” Crowley breathed into his ear, sending a shiver down Aziraphale’s spine. 

“Y-Yes” stuttered the Angel. Crowley growled as he pressed himself harder against his love. Crowley slid his knee between Aziraphale’s thighs, pushing them apart. Aziraphale sunk into Crowley, sighing in pleasure. Crowley slowly lowered his arm, taking his time to drag his nail down Aziraphale’s milky skin. Crowley brought his head up so he could take in the sight of his Angel. What he saw filled him with hunger, Aziraphale was resting against the wall grinding against his knee, biting his lower lip, face flushed, hair tousled. Crowley wanted to eat him up, to take him right then and there, but he steadied himself. He wiggled his knee against the Angels erection and Aziraphale laid his head against the wall and moaned. 

With every movement Aziraphale was begging for more. He craved it, needed it.

“Please Crowley,” he begged. 

“What is it you need, luv?” Crowley cooed. 

“I need more,” he whined. 

Crowley smirked and made about removing Aziraphale’s coat. He slid it off broad shoulders and let it slump to the ground unceremoniously. He undid his bow tie and drew it to the side before flinging it across the room, not caring where it went. He unbuttoned Aziraphale’s velvety soft waistcoat and let it flutter to the ground. 

Taking a deep breath he leaned in and pressed his lips against Aziraphales, bruising them with lust. He moaned into Aziraphale’s lips as he started to work at removing Aziraphale’s shirt. His hands were shaking with need as he fumbled with the buttons. He took another breath in and calmed himself. Before he resorted to ripping the shirt off the buttons gave and the shirt draped open. He tore his mouth away, but Aziraphale followed with a dejected sigh. 

Crowley pressed Aziraphale back against the wall and leaned in, sliding his tongue down his neck and along his collar bone. He took in the lovely amazingly sweet smell of old books and dust.

Aziraphale whined and arched his body against Crowly. 

This spurred Crowley on as he continued working his way down Aziraphale’s chest, eventually reaching Aziraphale’s nipple. He swirled his reptilian tongue around it, sucking it into his mouth and nipping at it lightly, causing Aziraphale to suck back his breath. He brought his hand up and started playing with the other bud. Flicking at it and rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. 

Aziraphale arched his back more and ground his throbbing cock against Crowley’s knee. 

“Crowley..” He breathed out, losing himself to his desire. 

Crowley sucked on the nipple then let it go with a pop. He grinned at the whimper that escaped from his Angel, it made his heart leap knowing he could bring this much desire to his love. He rested his forehead against Aziraphale’s round stomach. “Oh Angel..” He sighed contentedly. He looked back up to the Angel’s face and saw him radiating with love. 

Aziraphale opened his eyes and looked down at him. He placed his hands on either side of Crowley’s face. “Dearest…” He smiled. 

Crowley leaned into his hand and closed his eyes, taking in all the love his Angel was giving him. Crowley opened his eyes again. “Angel, are you sure?” he moved his hands to the buttons on Aziraphale’s trousers. 

“Yes dear. Please..” he begged

Crowley undid the buttons securing Aziraphale’s trousers, then pushed them down. He ran his hands down his Angel’s strong legs, over his sock garters, and he brought the trousers down to rest against Aziraphale’s feet.

Crowley let his arms drift back up to the waistband of Aziraphale’s pants. He slowly pulled at them, wanting to take his time, wanting to make this moment last. You only got firsts once and he wanted it to be perfect for his Angel. As he continued to pull them down, Aziraphale’s swollen cock appeared from beneath his pants,. shining with his desire. Crowley let the pants fall down on their own as he hungrily took in the site. 

Aziraphle moved his hips, begging to be touched and Crowley obliged him by taking his effort in his hand. Aziraphale ran his hands through Crowley’s hair, applying the slightest bit of pressure, craving Crowley’s touch. 

Crowley sent his forked tongue forth and licked the pre cum leaking out. It tasted salty, slightly sweet and heady, like a fine brew. He stretched his lips over the head and let his tongue work away at it. He hummed as he slowly took in Aziraphale’s effort all the way to the base, nudging his nose into the wonderfully scented fluff at the base of Aziraphale’s cock. He continued to hum as he made his way up and down, swirling his tongue. 

Aziraphale moaned and tightened his grip on Crowley's hair, moving his hips in tune with Crowley's motions. 

Crowley rocked his head back and forth as he gripped Aziraphale’s plump ass, he forced the Angel’s hips to move faster in time with him, to move him deeper so that he could feel him at the back of his throat. 

Aziraphale gripped harder, pulling at Crowly’s hair. He started to jerk and lose focus as he fell out of rhythm. 

Crowley continued to rock his hips in time as Aziraphale cried out, “Crowley I’m gonna come.” Crowley closed his eyes in anticipation as he squeezed the Angel’s ass. 

Aziraphale let his body jerk a few more times as he emptied his warm silky seed into his beloved's longing mouth.

Crowley moaned as he took in the wonderful taste of his Angel, he let it slide over his tongue so that he could savor every drop. 

Aziraphale loosened his grip on Crowley's hair and reached for Crowley, pulling him up. He drew Crowley in and kissed him greedily, tasting a hint of himself on the demon's mouth. He grabbed Crowley’s head and crushed him in for a glutinous kiss. He longed for Crowley, he had just had a taste of what pleasure could be, and he wanted more. He wanted all of Crowley, he needed him, he desired him. He pulled back, eyes blown as he stared into Crowley. “I need more… I need more of you.” Aziraphale begged which made Crowley growl.

Surprising them both Crowley flung Aziraphale over his shoulder and swiftly made his way up the stairs to the flat. 

“hmf….Oh...I do say..” Exclaimed a startled Aziraphale. 

Crowley didn’t say a word, he couldn’t he was too taken up with desire. His stiff cock was straining against his jeans. He opened the door to Aziraphale’s room and took a second to take it all in. 

There was a bed against the back wall with two side tables, a window to the left and a closet next to the door he was coming through. There was a trail to the bed and closet while the rest of the floor was covered in books. To make matters worse there was a fine layer of dust resting on everything. 

“When was the last time you were in here?” asked Crowley. 

Aziraphale looked over Crowley’s shoulder and flushed with embarrassment.  
“Oh dear,” he exclaimed as he snapped his fingers, the dust vanished and the books made their way to another part of the store for Aziraphale to deal with later. 

Crowley jostled Aziraphale’s shoulder and made his way to the bed, where he gently set Aziraphale down. He took in the sight of Aziraphale naked, his porcelain skin flawless and glowing, his tousled blond hair. His blue- topaz eyes, so full of desire. 

“Angel, you are so beautiful.” 

Aziraphale blushed and lowered his head. 

Crowley sent out his hand and caught Aziraphale lightly by the chin, tilting it up so they were eye to eye.

“Don’t hide Angel. You are the most beautiful thing in existence.” He leaned down and kissed Aziraphale. Lightly at first, just telling him he loved him, then slowly harder to express his growing desire. 

Aziraphale moaned and wrapped his arms around Crowley, bringing him down as he laid back onto the bed. He ran his hand through Crowley's hair expressing his own need. 

Crowley pulled back, much to the dissatisfaction of Aziraphale. “Angel, what do you want? What is it you need?” Crowley questioned. 

Aziraphale went six shades of pink at this. 

“I want you to take me Crowley, I want you in me.” 

Crowley growled and nipped at Aziraphale’s neck, sucking and licking fervently. 

Aziraphale turned his head offering himself up to Crowley. 

“Don’t stop,” he gasped, hips rising, his body begging for more. “You have too many clothes on,” sighed Aziraphale. 

In one swift motion, barely lifting his lips from Aziraphale’s succulent flesh, Crowley tore his shirt off and flung it in the air. 

Immediately, Aziraphale brought his hands to Crowley's chest, memorizing it with his fingertips every divot and arch, every scar. He would have to remind himself to ask Crowley about those later. Crowley was still wearing too many clothes and it was driving Aziraphale nuts. He wanted to be skin to skin with his love, he wanted to feel his warmth against his own. He snapped his fingers and to Crowley's shock the rest of his clothes were gone. 

Crowley reached down and gently grabbed both of their efforts in his hand. He moved his hips slowly rubbing himself against Aziraphale’s member. 

Aziraphale arched his back and let loose another moan. He found a pace that worked against Crowley's to increase the friction. 

Crowley’s effort was to the point of hurting, he needed a release so badly. 

“Angel I’m going to cum,” he whispered into Aziraphale’s ear. 

Panting, Aziraphale nuzzled Crowley’s head. “Please dearest, cum for me, show me how much you desire me.” 

At that, Crowley made an indistinguishable noise and hot seed landed over Aziraphale’s plump body. Crowley sighed and slumped down next to Aziraphale and flung an arm over his Angel. He purred in contentment. 

Aziraphale turned his head to look at Crowley. His eyes were shining. “Dearest..” He whispered as he reached down and found Crowley's cock. “I need you, please I need you in me.” 

Crowley let go of a little laugh. “You are insatiable.” 

Aziraphale blushed again “Dearest I have needed you for so long, please I need to have all of you, to know all of you, to devour you like the crumpet that you are.” 

Crowley raised his eyebrow 

“Crumpet?” 

He smiled and pulled Aziraphale on top of him. He snapped his fingers and a bottle of lube appeared. “Here, give me your hand.” 

Aziraphale obliged and Crowley pumped some lube onto his finger. 

“You need to get ready before I can enter you. I want you to show me just how much you need me, just how much you want me,” he said as his eyes shone with a mischievous grin. 

Yet again Aziraphale turned all sorts of pink. He couldn’t say a word around the lump in his throat so he just nodded and leaned down on Crowley and let his fingers find their way to his entrance. Slowly he pressed a finger in, rocking it back and forth getting it deeper after each small thrust. He worked himself open with one finger, until he thought he could take another. He bit his lip and arched his back up allowing himself to accept his fingers into himself. He worked the fingers spreading himself, working himself, readying his muscles to take Crowley’s shaft. 

Kissing the top of Aziraphales head Crowley cooed “Look at you, look how much you need me. Look at how beautiful you are, full of passion and love. Are you ready Angel? Are you ready to take me?” 

Aziraphale worked his hips and nodded his head emphatically. 

Crowley pet his head and gently pushed him up, putting more lube on his hand. “Such a good boy you are. You're going to need to slowly lower yourself onto my effort. This way you will be in control and it will be at your pace.” 

Aziraphale rose above Crowley’s member and lined it up with this throbbing whole. He slowly slid down, feeling the head of Crowley’s effort press into his entrance, expanding it farther than his fingers had done. He gasped and his eyes went wide, mouth gaping. 

Crowley looked on in anticipation. He took in the magnificence of the being in front of him. His alabaster skin was shining with dewy ecstasy. His thick hungry cock, bobbing against his plush tummy. Aziraphale was perfect, and for some reason he had decided to love Crowley. 

Aziraphale smiled down at Crowley and then dropped, taking Crowley all in, in one fell swoop. The both gasped and grabbed at each other. 

“Oh Angel..” Crowley arched his back and thrust getting as deep as he could into Aziraphale. 

Aziraphale hugged the demon as Crowley bucked his hips, Airaphles ass accepting him, eating him up, taking all of him in. They fit perfectly together, as if they had been made for each other. Who knew, maybe She had made them for each other. 

Crowley couldn’t take it anymore, the slow speed was killing him. He sped his thrusts up and felt Aziraphales fingers dig into his sides. They both rocked and both moaned loudly at the increasing speed. 

“Crowley I’m gonna come,” Aziraphale said breathlessly.

Crowley thrust harder. “Cum for me Angel, you deserve it.” 

Aziraphale’s cock twitched and sent hot seed between his and Crowley’s body. 

Crowley's eyes rolled back into his head. 

“I’m gonna..” was all he was able to get out before his body jerked and he sent his seed deep into his Angel, claiming him, taking all of him and making his Angel truly his. He hugged Aziraphale as a slight tear appeared at the corner of his eye. They were together, they could be together, they could have this forever. He sighed and kissed the Angel on the head again. 

“How was that Angel? Feeling satisfied?” 

Aziraphale looked up at him.

“Oh dear, that was amazing.I never knew it could be like this. I never knew we could be like this. Oh Crowley, I love you so much.” Crowley squeezed him tightly. 

“I love you, too, Angel, forever and always.” They rolled over, Crowley snapped his fingers and they were both cleaned up. He grabbed Aziraphale and pulled him close. 

Aziraphale snuggled into Crowley's arms and nuzzled his head against his demon's chest. 

“Crowley, my love, thank you so much for everything,” he sighed. “I wish.. I want… I oh..” He blushed to the tips of his ears.

“What is it, dove? What is it you want?” Crowley kissed the other’s head.

“I wish to taste you my love. To bring you to peak.” He whispered

Crowley closed his eyes and purred. 

“Oh yes Angel, please.” He shifted in anticipation  
Aziraphale kissed his way down Crowley's chest taking time to play with his nipples. Aziraphale reached his prize and slid his hand around the base of the shaft.

Crowley groaned and rocked his hips, his body begging for more.

Aziraphale licked the tip of the head, lapping up the pre that was shining there. He lingered on the taste savoring it, memorizing it. He lightly swirled his tongue around the head teasing Crowley as he heard the moans and gasps coming from his partner. With a smirk Aziraphale took Crowley’s effort in one swift movement. 

Crowley’s eyes flew open and he gasped as his body bucked, sending his effort to the back of Aziraphale’s throat. 

Aziraphale shifted his head from side to side and used his tongue to massage the member as he started rocking his head back and forth. Taking Crowley in long swift strokes.

Crowley started seeing stars as he closed his eyes again feeling the lovely pressure and administrations to his effort. He reached out and grabbed his Angel's hair and started rutting to the rhythm Aziraphale had set. Feeling the build up in him. 

“Angel… I’m going to cum,” he breathed out.

Aziraphale doubled his efforts and felt Crowley shiver as he tasted the slick slide over his tongue and to the back of his throat. He closed his eyes and took it all in, enjoying the salty and heady taste of Crowley’s essence. He backed off the tender shaft and kissed his way back up to his love. 

Crowley brought Aziraphale’s mouth to his, tasting himself on his Angel. Slipping a tongue between the other’s lips flicking it now and then, driving the desire back up to a fever pitch. He growled again and worked his hands down Aziraphale’s body. Dragging his nails and nipping at his neck. He bucked up and shifted so that he was on top of Aziraphale. 

Aziraphale gasped in shock as he was laid on his back hands pinned above his head.

“Oh Angel, you drive me nuts. Everything that you do makes me love you more and I just want to devour you.” 

He emphasised it by nipping at the others neck.

Aziraphale let out a little yip and playfully struggled against Crowley's hands. 

“Oh no, Angel you are mine. But don’t worry I will take good care of you.” He smiled mischievously, then snapped his fingers.

Aziraphale’s eyes widened as he felt his entrance suddenly, but gently stretched and got ready to be taken.  
Crowley lowered one of his arms down and drew a line down the middle of Aziraphale’s chest and down to his partner's pale curls. He lifted Aziraphale’s leg up over his shoulder and looked down lovingly at his Angel. 

“Are you wanting this, luv?”

Eyes blown Aziraphale nodded, shifting his hips in response. 

“Are you sure?” Crowley drawled

“PLEASE Crowley I need you.” Begged Aziraphale 

Crowley used his other hand to pet Aziraphale’s soft blond curls as he kissed him. He slowly slid his member into Aziraphale’s tight hole. 

Aziraphale started panting and working his hips lightly getting used to the pressure filling him up, making him feel whole.

Crowley set a slow and steady pace, working Aziraphale’s prostate and hitting the spot just right. 

Aziraphale gripped the sheets above his head and arched his back. 

“Crowley….. Oh… Ah...I’m…” Aziraphale’s wings burst out just as his slick spilled forth onto his stomach.

At the sight of Aziraphale’s wings Crowley’s were brought forth in response to a show of love and need. Crowley gripped Aziraphale’s hips and buried himself deep into his love. He curled up next to Aziraphale and pet his luscious hair again. 

“How was that, Angel?” he panted.

Aziraphale cooed

“Mmm, that was lovely.” He wrapped his arms around Crowley and buried his head into his chest.

They wrapped each other in their wings and drifted off into a peaceful sleep together. 

* * *  
Crowley awoke before the Angel and leaned over to kiss him on the forehead. He stretched and slid out of bed, doing his best to not disturb Aziraphale. Crowley snapped his fingers and he was fully dressed and refreshed for the day. He looked over at his love. He wanted to get him something special. They had taken their relationship to the next level last night and it deserved celebrating. 

As he quietly made his way down stairs, he looked at the wall where he had pleasured Aziraphale and smiled. He snapped his fingers again and Aziraphale’s clothes were wrinkle free and hanging in the closet. He knew Aziraphale would have been put out seeing his treasured clothes crumpled on the floor. 

Crowley headed to the door and took one last look at the shop, letting the night's events flow over him once more before turning to leave the shop, locking it up on his way outside his way down the street. 

Crowley had a small list to fulfill: food, flowers, and tea. He scratched his head as he wondered where to go and what food to get. He eventually decided on bagels and gravlax, with cinnamon buns. 

As for flowers, he would need a gardenia, heather, a red rose and some tulips. Aziraphale knew the language of flowers just as much as he did, so he knew Aziraphale would see the meaning of beauty and love in the bouquet he would put together. 

He would also have to head to Aziraphale’s favourite tea shop to get him a bag of his favourite loose tea.. He loved his visits with his Angel, but what excited him about this particular morning was the fact that he could finally show Aziraphale how much he loved him. Now that it had been some time they had averted the apocalypse he was finally able to show his Angel how he feels.

He looked down at the treasures he had collected. It seemed like a weak gesture when what he really wanted was to engulf his Angel with love. A smile crept along his mouth at the thought. They had shared so much last night and they were going to continue to get so close to each other. He wanted to run to him, wrap his arms around him and never let him go. 

His excitement to return quickly faded as the bookshop came into view.

Crowley stopped short at the sight of AZ Fell and Co’s front doors flung wide open, books scattered, and loose papers flying out through the door. The goods were quickly forgotten on the ground as Crowley broke into a run towards the door. .

“Aziraphale?” 

There was no answer as he hurried through the stacks of books, tearing through the already destroyed bookshop, desperate to find his Angel.

“Aziraphale!” 

The shop remained silent as he checked the sitting area. The next stop was the dusty flat above the bookshop, but Crowley was losing hope. 

“Aziraphale, you bastard, where are you?” There was no sign in the flat either, Flashes of the fire appeared in front of him. His heart dropped and sweat beaded on his forehead. 

He ran down the stairs and saw a glimmer of white under Aziraphales desk. He quickly bent over to get a closer look, and was horrified by what he saw. Three primary feathers lay discarded and bloodied on the floor. Crowley took the feathers gently into his hands, eyes flashing amber with fury.. They had gotten him. They had taken his Angel.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please be advised there is torture and rape elements in this chapter. 
> 
> It will be rough, but there will be a happy ending eventually.
> 
> Don't hate me too much lol.

Light burned Aziraphale's eyes as he slowly opened them. He was in a large stark room that was glowing white. . It was jarring being in heaven again. The cold, metallic nature, lacking anything warm or personal. 

Someone approached him and he tried to focus on them. A smooth, but snide voice addressed him.

“About time you woke, Sunshine.” 

Fear filled Aziraphale, but he lifted his head up, squinting into the light. He was sitting in a chair with his arms bound to either side. All four Archangels stood in front of him, alongside Beelzebub and the dukes of hell. A crowd of excited angels and demons had gathered to watch from behind them. 

“We need to have a chat, Aziraphale,” Gabriel said with a smirk. 

Aziraphale quirked an eyebrow 

“Well, if all you needed was a chat, you could have just called. I rightly think this is a tad bit of an overreaction. Aziraphale smiled cordially at his ex-superiors.

His comment was met with the back of Gabriel's hand against his cheek, causing him to reel back as pain exploded across his face.

“Shut your stupid mouth,” growled Gabriel. In a moment he caught himself, clearing his throat as he straightened his tie. 

“Letzzz get thizzzz started.” 

Belelzebub waved over one of the disposable demons standing near them, who then   
walked towards him with a bounce in his step . He reached behind him and pulled out a glowing demonic blade, its sharp tip forming the shape of a claw. . 

Aziraphale could tell from that bright red glow that this blade had been forged in hellfire. Aziraphale's blue eyes widened with desperation as he turned to look at Gabriel. 

“But, we are supposed to be the good guys.” 

Gabriel laughed without a hint of remorse in his gaze.  
“That’s the great part, Sunshine, you are no longer an angel, and you're not a demon, either. As such, you are outside of all jurisdictions. We can do whatever the hell or heaven we want to you with no repercussions.” 

Aziraphale looked into Gabriel's violet eyes and saw the disgust resting there. He just didn’t understand how he could have trusted Heaven so much. He had spent his life trying so hard to be a good angel for them, to do what they asked. Apparently, that was never going to be good enough. He lowered his head in defeat, knowing that nothing he could do to prevent this from happening. They had always thought less of him, and now they were going to do what they had always wanted to do: to tear him down completely.

“But why?” 

“Because you need to be made an example of, to be punished for what you did. Since we can’t kill you the traditional way, we will make you wish that you were dead.” Gabriel turned away from the principality towards the Disposable Demon.. “Now shut him up, I don’t want to hear him speak.” 

The demon snapped his fingers and a fabric gag was forced into Aziraphales mouth. 

His eyes went wide as he saw the knife stretching out to his restrained arm. He bit down on the gag and squeezed his eyes shut tight as the pain in his arm flared wide open. The knife tore into his flesh, cutting the outline of a rectangle on his forearm. Aziraphale steeled himself for the next slice, wondering through the pain why the demon had cut this particular shape.. 

The demon moved around his chair and sliced his other arm the same. 

“Hurry this up, I don’t have all day.” 

Gabriel snapped his fingers and suddenly Aziraphale was sitting nude in the chair, a muffled sound escaped through the gag, tears spilling down his face. He shifted in the chair looking at the floor, shame burning on his cheeks..

In quick succession the demon continued to cut rectangles all over his body: under his feet, over his legs, back, over his stomach, around his nipples, and even on each of his cheeks. 

Aziraphale was shaking and dripping with sweat by the time he was done. Despite the pain, he found himself hoping that Crowley was free, far away from here, and that he wouldn’t come to save him. He prayed to Somebody that Crowley would remain safe.

* * *

Crowley stalked around the bookshop shaking in fear as he looked at the bloodied feather. He needed a plan, he needed help. Crowley needed a way to stay safe and to stay one step ahead of the people who took his Angel. He needed... hell, he didn’t know everything he needed. He ran his hands through his hair. He had no idea how he was going to do any of that. 

Maybe he could ask Book Girl to help him. She would be able to tell him if Aziraphale was in heaven or in hell., and he needed to know that before he could come up with any plan. 

With new hope blossoming, Crowley marched out of the bookstore and slid into the Bentley. 

“Baby, we’re going to Tadfield, let’s make haste.” The car revved and launched into motion, speeding down the road to their destination as Queen blared from the speakers. 

‘Storm the master-marathon I'll fly through,   
by flash and thunder-fire I'll survive,  
Then I'll defy the laws of nature and come out alive,   
then I'll get you’

* * *

“Before this gets too bloody, I would like to have a little fun. What about you three?” Gabriel said, straightening his tie.

Sandalphone rubbed his hands together and sneered, his gold tooth shining as he nodded. 

Micheal flicked her head in disdain “I would not soil my vessel with the likes of him.” 

Uriel screwed up her nose in disgust, but nodded in affirmation. 

Gabriel stepped forward removing his jacket. His violet eyes blown with the thought of fucking the puny Angel. 

‘He lets that demon fuck him, so I will fuck him so hard he will forget that foul fiend.’

He snapped his fingers and Aziraphale was free, but another snap and his hands were shackled behind his back. 

His eyes watered as he pleaded with Gabriel with his eyes, shaking his head. He tried to stand up and move away, but Gabriel already had him in his hands and was turning him around leaning him against the chair.

Gabriel opened his fly and removed his pulsing member. He dug his nails into Aziraphale’s ass as he spread him wide. 

Aziraphale squirmed as he tried to fight back but was being held down with celestial power. 

With no preamble Gabriel forced himself into Aziraphale’s taut ass, letting out a moan of desire. 

Aziraphale screamed behind the gag as his whole body tensed up, more tears cut paths down his face. He whimpered as Gabriel kept thrusting into him at increasing speed. Blood smeared his ass. 

Gabriel’s hands became covered in blood from the cuts along his back, but he didn’t care he was going to wreck Aziraphale. Gabriel's eyes flashed and he was frenzied, he lost control and just kept thrusting into the poor angel, reveling in the shrill cries from Azirapfale. Gabriel trembled and released himself into Aziraphale. 

He slapped his ass “How was that you little slut?” He sneered. Snapping he was set all to rights and back to his ruthlessly impeccable self. 

Aziraphale whimpered and slumped as best as he could.

* * *  
He reached Tadfield in record time and pounded on the cottage door until it was flung open.

“For fuck sakes what is the flipping matter?” Barked Anathema. “Oh it’s you, what do you want?” She threw her hand on her hip.

Crowley pushed past her and entered the house. 

“I need your help, they have him. They have my Angel.” 

Anathema closed the door and turned to face him. 

“That would be the other fella that was with you at the Air base?” She questioned 

“Yes bloody hell keep up. I need you to find him, I need you to tell me if he is in heaven or in hell. I need to save him, who knows what they are doing to him. Come on do your witch thing.” He blurted out. 

Anathema put her hands up and stepped back. 

“Wha wha wha wha, slow down. Tell me what happened and I can see what I can do.” 

Crowley glared at her. “I already told you they took him, I don’t know how I just know that he is gone and that they took him.” 

Anathema sighed “Ok, well do you have anything of his? Something that belongs to him that I can use to locate him?” 

Crowley frowned, he didn’t have anything of the Angels on him. He tried thinking what could be used, he snapped his fingers and one of Aziraphale’s bow ties appeared in his hand. 

“Would this work?”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note torture in this chapter. Rape elements, beatings and forced feeding.
> 
> One more chapter with torture. 
> 
> Please bare with me I didn't have a beta reader for this. Looking for one if anyone is interested.

He moved Aziraphale around so that he was kneeling in front of him. Gabriel snapped again and the gag was gone. 

“Gabriel please….” A loud slap radiated through the room. 

“You will not talk, you will open your mouth and taste yourself on me, until you taste me in you. And you better swallow it all. Any biting and I will personally rip your tongue out.” 

Pain filled Aziraphale’s face as he flicked his eyes away, trying hard to remove himself from the situation. He knew Gabriel could be harsh and unkind but he didn’t know he could be so cruel. 

Gabriel grabbed his jaw and glared down at him. 

“Open wide whore.” 

Aziraphale obeyed and opened his mouth as Gabriel forced his effort into his mouth. It was warm and sticky, covered with sperm. It tasted bitter, just like Gabriel, it had none of the pleasant notes that Crowley had. 

Gabriel dug his nails into the back of his head so hard he drew blood and he began to thrust ruthlessly. 

Aziraphale gagged as he forgot he didn’t need to breathe. 

Gabriel laughed. “You’re nothing, you can’t even remember the slightest thing about being an Angel. You don’t need to breathe, or eat, or sleep. You have never been a good Angel and now you aren’t even that. You are just a worthless piece of shit to be wiped off my shoe.” 

He fucked Aziraphales mouth even harder, feeling his effort at the back of Aziraphale’s throat.

More tears flowed down Aziraphale’s face. Not just because of the pain from his cuts and his torn hole, but because he felt shame at what Gabriel was doing to him. 

Gabriel jerked and Aziraphale felt the warm liquid splatter at the back of his throat. As commanded he swallowed it all and tried not to bring it back up. He wanted to wretch and purge his body of Gabriel's foul seed. 

Snapping Gabriel was set all to rights and back to his ruthlessly impeccable self. He walked back over to those who were standing in audience.

Aziraphale was sobbing and trembling, this hurt him more than the physical pain of the cuts. This had been something special between him and Crowley. It was now soiled, tainted. His heart reached out for Crowley, he wished he would come and save him, but he was so grateful Crowley wasn’t here to see this, to see what they were doing to him, to see what he had become. He prayed that he was safe and remained so. 

* * *

Anathema sat in front of a circle with glyphs drawn in the center and candles around the edge. She placed the bow tie into the centre. She closed her eyes and started chanting. The candles flared and the bow tie started to glow and levitate. The bow tie flashed blue and then fell to the ground. 

“What happened? Did you find him? Did it work?” Anathema opened her eyes and looked him dead in the eyes. 

“I found him, he is in heaven and I fear it is not good.” Crowley ran his hands down his face, 

“Shit. I was hoping it would be hell, cause then I could at least reach him.” 

Anathema thought for a moment “Well I felt demonic energy up there so it looks like they have opened the gates to Hell for now.” 

This brought some light back to Crowley's face, but then all colour drained from his face, 

“If they are working together then Aziraphale is in great danger, who knows what they will do to him.” 

He paced around the room. 

“I need a plan, I need to think of what to do, Fuck. What can I do?” 

Anathema watched the demon wishing there was something she could do, but there was nothing she could offer. “How are you going to get into Heaven? You can’t just walk through the front gates.” 

Crowley stopped, that was exactly what he had been planning on doing, just storming in and taking back his Angel, but he knew she was right. He snapped his head up. 

“The shop!” he exclaimed 

“What shop?” Asked Anathema 

“Aziraphale’s bookshop, he has a glyph on the floor that can transport me to heaven. The only thing is I won't know where in heaven Aziraphale is. It’s not like it is a small place and the less time I am there the less chance I have of getting caught.” He explained. 

“Well I can help with the locating part, I can enchant this bow tie so that it will lead it to him, but there is little else I think I can do to help. I don’t think it is wise to just go strolling in though. Is there anything else you can do that can increase your chances of not getting caught.” Anathema worried. 

“Not really I mean I could use a disguise, but that would only work from afar, since they would be able to scent me up close. I just don’t know what else I can do, but I can’t leave him there. I can’t let them hurt him, I can’t let them torture him, because I KNOW how bad hell can get and the Angels can be even worse.” 

He just stood there looking into space, he was trying not to get overwhelmed by it all. 

“What do you mean scent? Like smell you?” She inquired 

“Yeah all us celestial and demonic beings have individual scents. It's part of how we identify each other since our physical forms are so fluid.” He sighed 

“Well I might be able help you with that. I can give you a different scent, but you will have to be quick, because it will only last for a short time, and by short I mean I don’t have a clue how long it will last.” 

She smiled and continued “Ok I think you might have a chance to do this, so long as everything goes right.” 

Crowley looked at her “A small chance is better than no chance. Ok lets get on with this, we have no time to spare.”

* * *

He tried to stand up, but there was a hand suddenly in his hair pulling hard dragging him towards the center of the room. Aziraphale couldn’t look up, but he knew those shoes, Sandalphon. He closed his eyes and prayed as he was brought to a stop. There was a snap and his hands were secured in front of him, but not for long, they were placed on a hook above his head, it was tightened until he was swaying on the tips of his toes. Tears stained his face and blood was smeared all over his body. He looked at Sandalphon in the eye and dared him, he was stronger than that foul Archangel, and he would not give him the pleasure of pleading. 

Sandalphon’s eye twitched and without saying a word he punched Aziraphale in the stomach. 

All the air escaped Aziraphale and he hunched into himself as much as he could. 

Sandalphon lip twitched into an evil grin. He made his way around Aziraphale, like a boxer, punched him, bruising him, breaking his bones with the force of his fists. He hit him in the ribs around the kidneys and along his back, all the soft spots that would cause the most harm. Sandalphone cracked his knuckles and assessed the growing bruises on the soft angels corporation. Snickering he laid into the Angel again revamping his efforts. 

Aziraphale cried out, pleading with him to stop, but to no avail, if anything it drove him on. 

This was easy for Sandalphone since he enjoyed using his fists, getting his hands dirty, which at this point were smeared with blood from the cuts and from his own efforts. The impact of his fists caused the cuts to sting and blood to splatter. Sandalphon walked in front of Aziraphale and punched him right in the face, breaking his nose. He punched him over and over in the face until his eyes were swollen and blood streaked his face. 

Sandalphone moved to his back and tapped between Aziraphales shoulder blades. 

“Wings out” He barked.

“No please” Aziraphale weezed out.

“Either you do it or I rip them out.” He said as he made his point by digging into the tender blood soaked flesh. 

Shaking Aziraphale slowly brought his wings forth from the spiritual plane and tucked them as close to him as he could.

“Spread them out and leave them there, or I will sheer them off completely.” 

Aziraphale splayed his wings and grit his teeth. His ears were ringing, but he could hear the pull of the first feather.

Sandalphone started pulling out feathers one at a time, drawing out a silent breath with each one. 

Aziraphale grit his teeth, compared to the pain he had so far sustained this was manageable, but humiliating. Having the ability to fly taken from him, even just for a short time was a hit to him. He loved to fly, to feel the freedom of it, it had been the only times he had truly felt free, outside of his time with Crowley.

Blood pooled on his wing as more and more feathers fell to the ground. It was agony in it’s quietness. It was almost a reprieve, if it didn’t allow Aziraphale to dwell on what had happened to him so far, and to fret about what was going to happen next. Surly there wasn’t much more they would do to him. He breathed in and he felt the sharpness of his ribs where the bones had been broken. 

Sandalphone was growing bored with this one feather at a time crap. He started ripping feathers out fistfuls at a time. He heard the sharp gasps from the putrid angel before him, with each fist full of feathers. He stripped one wing and then started working through the other wing in a frenzy, not wanting to wait for his next bit of fun.

Once he was done with the second wing he walked around and punched Aziraphale in the face again. 

“I’ve just been tendering you up, little piggy.” He Wheezed poking Aziraphale in the stomach.

“6,000 years of gluttony and you still haven’t stopped.” He smirked “Let’s see if we can satiate your hunger you filthy pig.” 

He snapped and a table appeared with assorted foods and teas, a blender and a long tube with a funnel at the end. 

Aziraphale’s eyes went wide “Please no.” 

Another fist met his face. “Oh yes. You wanted your food, so I will give it to you.” 

Aziraphale clenched his mouth shut, but Sandalphon pried it open and started shoving the tube down his throat. Aziraphale coughed and sputtered and tried to fight against the tube, but it was pressed in tearing and bleeding. Sandalphon didn’t stop forcing the tube in until he was certain it was all the way in. Aziraphale continued to gag. Tears streamed down his face. 

“Let’s start with the crépes.” 

He walked over to the table and grabbed a plate loaded with crépes and poured them into the industrial blender. After it was all mulched he brought the carafe to Aziraphale and poured it down the funnel. It wasn’t slow, he just poured it down filling Aziraphale up. 

Tears flowed down his face. 

‘why were they doing this to him? He had just wanted humanity to live on. Why was She allowed this? What more could he have done?’ 

He could feel his stomach bloating with the addition of the mush. 

‘Why dear God, why?’

“Now let's try some apples, since we know you were tempted the same time Eve was. A reminder of what you should have avoided.”

Sandalphone grabbed the bowl of apples and placed them into the blender. Again he poured it down the tube and Aziraphale swung from the chain. 

Aziraphale could feel his stomach start to extend. 

This continued through more of his favorite foods and his dear tea. Everything from sushi and filet mignon to hot cocoa and tea.. He could see and feel his stomach increasing. He felt gross, he felt nasty, he felt like he was going to throw up, but Sandalphon miracled it that he wasn’t allowed to regurgitate. Everything that was poured down just made his gut bigger and bigger. He couldn’t take anymore of it. There was no were else for it to go but to stretch out.

“Sandalphon, lets someone else have a turn.” Barked Gabriel. “Uriel you are up next.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the last and worst of the torture. Please be warned it gets rough. Please note there is flesh eating here.
> 
> I thank shesakillerqueen for editing this for me.

Crowley stood outside the circle lighting the last candle. 

He let out a big sigh. “Ok now for a disguise.” 

He pondered whether to go as an angel or a demon. He settled on a demon because if some of his scent came through there would be a possible reason. He looked at the witch and snapped his fingers. 

“How do I look?”

“Well… you definitely don’t look like yourself.” She cringed. 

He snapped his fingers again and a large standing mirror appeared in front of him. He was the same height and his eyes were the same, but was much larger all around. His slick features were gone and he was left with a face that one would describe as looking like quasimodo. His face was grey and he had an overly large spider stuck to the side. 

He shuddered “Yeah ok that will have to do.” He turned back to Anathema. “Ok Book girl it’s your turn.” 

She nodded and looked down to her book and held up the bow tie. She closed her eyes and chanted a few lines from the book and it began to glow again as it started to hover. She handed the bow tie over to Crowley who put it in the pocket of his ugly brown suit. 

“Ok now for the scent change. Since you are going demonic is there any scent that you would prefer?” 

He shook his head “Nah, just anything demonic will work.” He grinned slightly “Be kinda funny to have a demon with an Angel scent.” 

Anathema forced a smile. “Ok let’s get this done.”

* * *

Uriel walked over to Aziraphale with purpose. She stood in front of him and poked at his gut making him groan. 

“My gift to you, will not be physical pain, but will probably hurt you the most. We all know how you are obsessed with the written word and all those books of yours. You stupid little thing, I am going to take your joy of reading. You will lose your ability to read.” 

“Please..no” Aziraphale begged as he shook his head. 

Without answering she continued. “You will lose your ability to read and write. More or less you will find your books nothing but a hindrance now.” 

Aziraphale was weeping, he kept begging, “No.. No… Please… No…” 

She placed her hands on either side of his head and he tried to shake her free, but she just forced his head still. She closed her eyes and silently moved her mouth. He could feel her digging into his mind shifting. 

He grit his teeth and tried to force her out of his mind, to put up a wall to hide the parts of him she was after. He was able to hide a little from her, but in the end she achieved her goal. 

* * *

Anathema flipped through her book. Finding the spell she looked it over making sure she had everything she needed on the desk. 

“Ok we are all set.” 

She poured some herbs into a bowl and ground them down, to it she added some patchouli oil and dripped in some of her blood. She blended it all together as she chanted. There was a flash of flame and it appeared as a liquid. 

“Ok now you need to apply it, you need to rub it in until it disappears.” She handed him the bowl. 

“To the whole body or just to the exposed parts?” He asked, staring at it. 

“Just the exposed parts should be ok. Just remember it has a short life span. So get in and get out as soon as you can.” He nodded as he started applying the concoction. The substance slowly sinks into his skin as he rubs it in, until it is all gone. 

“Don't Forget to go home.You could be in danger if they find you here. Thank you for all you have done. Ok let’s hope I can use the sigil.” 

He steps over to the circle and places his hands together, closes his eyes and says a prayer. 

“I would like entrance to heaven to witness what is happening to the traitor Angel.” 

A blue light appears coming up from the circle. Crowley looks back at Anathema 

“Well here goes nothing.”

He looks back and walks into the circle.

* * *

She released his head and stood back looking at him. 

He just let his head hang as tears fell to the ground. 

She lifted his head with a finger. “Gabe I think he is almost broken, perhaps it is time to finish this.” She dropped his head and walked towards Gabriel. 

“Not yet we have one more thing before we can sign off on this.” He looked towards the demon that had started with the cutting. “Are you ready to finish up your treat?” 

The demon nodded and walked over to Aziraphale flipping his blade back and forth. “Do you want him gagged or not?” He quirked his eyebrow at Gabriel. 

“Gag him, I am tired of his blubbering. I don’t need to have my ears pierced by his useless wails.” The demon shrugged and snapped as a fresh gag appeared in Aziraphale’s mouth. 

* * *

The brightness, the whiteness of heaven stung Crowley’s eyes. He looked around to see where he was, trying to get his bearings, it had been so long since he had been here that he was sure he didn’t know where anything was anymore. He has appeared in what looked like a dead end hallway. He made his way towards the entrance and peaked around. It was just another hallway, but this one ran both ways and was lined with doors on either side. 

He brings out the bow tie and lets it float in his hand, it slowly spins a few times then starts to head towards the left. He follows the thing through the maze of hallways until he sees a few Angels down one of the corridors. He panics as he doesn’t know where to go.

Should he try one of the doors or should he turn back? Should he keep going? He cracks his neck and decides that the least suspicious thing to do would be to keep walking past the Angels, hoping his scent has changed enough. He tucks the bow tie away and walks forward, thinking one step at a time, one step at a time. He begins to sweat a little. All is good until he passes the Angels, one of them sniffs and snaps his head toward him.

“It’s him.” He reaches out, but Crowley lunges into motion and runs down the corridors, the two angels quick on his heels. 

“Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck. I guess it wasn’t enough”

His mind is spinning, what does he do now? What can he do? He kept running looking back to see how far the birds were behind him. Snapping his head forward he turns around another corner. He fell to a stop as he ran head first into another angel. 

The two behind him slowed and smirked at him. 

“Well shit.” he breathed out. 

The Angels grabbed him by each arm flanking him as they dragged him down the hall. 

“Well now won’t Gabriel be happy with what we found? A real feather in our wing, not to mention more entertainment.” They all laughed.

* * *

Aziraphale could see the blade but right then he didn’t care. He had lost so much already, what more could they take from him? ‘Cut me more, I don’t care, just get it done with.’ That was until he realized what the demon was doing. 

The demon went over to one of the rectangles he had cut into his cheek and he carefully slipped the knife under the skin and proceeded to pull the skin away from his body. 

He jerked as his eyes went wide and he screamed against the gag. 

The demon looked him in the eye and brought his flesh to his mouth. The demon was careful in his ministrations, slowly peeling each patch of skin off, and proceeded to eat each patch of flesh he tore from his body. Blood flowed down his body from each patch that was taken. 

Aziraphle tried to hurl, he tried to bring up all the food that had been pumped into him. He couldn’t believe that this was happening. He was shaking, he had no control of his body. Every inch of him hurt, his mind was fractured. He tried to call out to Crowley, he wanted Crowley so bad, he needed him to save him, or for them to just kill him.

The demon made his way down his back, down his legs and to the bottom of his feet. He made his way to Aziraphales chest and tore at the flesh until it reached his nipples. He slid his knife and sliced each one off allowing the rest of the skin to easily be pulled off. 

There was no real thought left to Aziraphale. He was trapped in his body, in his mind, just feeling the pain. 

“Alright that does it.” Gabriel announced happily, “Now to just sign off on this. Everyone who is in attendance will scorch their sigil into his body. Just find a piece of flesh and sign your name.”

Gabriel made a show of walking up to sign his sigil directly to Aziraphales forehead. Next was Beelzebub, followed by the Archangels and the dukes of hell. In total there were thirty three Angels and thirty three demons. Aziraphale’s flesh was covered in marks, but he didn’t notice. He was gone to the pain and broken. There was nothing left of him to fight.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta by the awesome shesakillerqueen, you should go read her stuff it is really great.

They entered the main room and they passed the large globe of the earth and Crowley came face to face with the Angels and Demons. He glared at Gabriel and Beelzebub. He looked around trying to find Aziraphale. He saw a chair and then he saw something hanging from a chain. His eyes widened, and he lurched forward. 

“AZIRAPHALE!!!” 

He screamed as the angels beside him held him where he was. 

“AZIRAPHALE….” Tears stung his eyes. 

“YOU BASTARDS WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM?” 

He continued to fight trying to get to his Angel 

“Oh Angel.” He whispered. 

Crowley tried to make sense of what he was seeing. His Angel was covered in blood from head to toes, his hair was matted with it and it was hard to see what was going on under the blood. 

The Demon spun Aziraphale so that he was facing Crowley and he smiled as Crowley balked. He realized that some of what he thought was dried blood was actually signatures. They covered his body in an odd design that confused Crowley. There were patches over his body that were covered the most with blood but held no signatures and he realized what it was he was seeing. He looked down and threw up. 

‘My god what have they done to you Angel?’ Thought Crowley. 

Gabriel grinned “I can see you are taking in all of our hard work. Not only is he worthless, he is broken now. I will be surprised if he even knows you are here. And soon it will be your turn.” He grinned at Crowley. Sandalphone walked over and slugged him in the face causing him to spit blood.

There was a hum that echoed through the room after the punch. 

Gabriel frowned and looked back at Aziraphale, who’s eyes were going white. 

“What the fuck is going on with him?” frowned Gabriel.

Crowley just stared, and called Aziraphale’s name over and over again. Sandalphone spun and punched Crowley right in his gut causing the demon to stumble back a step. The hum turned to a screech and Gabriel looked at Aziraphale again. Sandalphone frowned but punched Crowley in the face a few more times, breaking his nose and blackening his eyes.

Aziraphale’s eyes were glowing white now and six wings shot out from his back, four pure white covered in glowing blue eyes and two stripped bare. 

Gabriel looked confused, “What the fuck?” 

There is a flash of white light that blinded everyone in the room and Aziraphale floated above the ground with four heads and crown on his human head and his flaming sword in his hand. 

“Did you forget that I am a Cherubim by creation?” Aziraphale said in a dual toned voice. 

“You may have ranked me Principality, but I have always been a Cherubim. Not just a Cherubim, but a soldier of the Lord, Air Marshal of Her holy forces.” His white and multitude of blue eyes slid over to Sandalphone

“You touch my Demon again and I will end you.” The Angels loosened their grip on Crowley, who ran to Aziraphale. 

“Angel, Angel...Are you alright?” 

Aziraphale ignored him and continued to address the host of beings. Aziraphale lowered his staff down at Gabriel and Beezalbub.

“I would suggest you truly leave us be, or I will be forced to raise heaven and hell.” 

With a flash of light they were gone.

* * *

Crowley opened his eyes and saw a wood floor. He turned his head and saw he was splayed out on the floor of the bookshop. 

“Angel!” pushed himself up and looked around. 

There by the stairs lay Aziraphale face first on the ground reverted back to his normal form. Crowley stood up and ran over, hovering his hands above Aziraphale's broken body, too scared to touch him. 

“Angel.” He breathed out. 

There was no movement or noise. He snapped his fingers trying to fix the pieces of missing flesh, but nothing happened. He tried to miracle away the signature glyphs, but again nothing happened. He ran his hands through his hair and was reminded of the disguise, he snapped his fingers and returned to normal. He gently took Aziraphale by the shoulders, turned him over and picked him up. There was a small groan that escaped from Aziraphale, but there was nothing to be done about it. He needed to get the angel upstairs and onto his bed. He needed to get him cleaned and bandaged up. He could do that, he had been a medic in World War II, stupid Beelzabub had wanted him to help the Axis continue fighting so helping them heal had been his bloody job. He pushed the memory away and continued his way upstairs. He opened the door to the flat there was dust everywhere, books everywhere. Stacks here and there. He made his way to the bed, it was wood and looked soft, there was a tan tartan quilt on top decorated with frilly pillows to match. There was a side table and a lamp, but other than that there were just lots and lots of books and dust. 

He gently laid Aziraphale out on the bed and took a good look at him assessing everything that he would need. He would need lots of bandages for the parts of missing flesh, splints for the broken bones, no no he needs to clean him first. Peroxide and fresh clothes, oh wait he needed an IV to make sure he can administer painkillers without constantly having to stab at the Angel. He looked at Aziraphale’s stomach and just noticed that it was larger than normal. Very gently he placed his hand on the stomach and felt a great deal of pressure. He tried to miracle it away, but again there was no effect. 

“Ok, ok so need to sort that out too, not sure what I’m going to do about that though” He sighed.

He dropped to his knees next to the bed and gently clasped Aziraphale's hand. 

“Oh Angel, I wish I had been there sooner. Why didn’t you save yourself sooner? Why did you let them do that to you? Oh Angel WHY? Please get better. Know that I love you and that I am here. I will make you better Angel. I will make sure you heal up, just don’t leave me. I can’t live without you.” Tears streamed down his face as he put his head down to the hand.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dealing with PTSD.  
> Again thanks to my beta reader shesakillerqueen. Please go check out her stuff.
> 
> Also Thank you to all who have read my story so far I can't believe over 1,500 people have read it. If you cave any concerns or questions please leave a comment. Thank you all again.

It had taken him hours to clean Aziraphale and bandage all his wounds and splint the broken bones. He didn’t know how long it would take for the flesh to grow back, but he knew it wouldn’t be soon and he wasn’t sure if the nipples would ever grow back. It had caused Aziraphale great pain as he had moaned and groaned during the process. He had had to bite his tongue so as not to cry at the small sad sounds. 

He had called Anathema and had told her what had happened and how Aziraphale was. He asked her to find some spells for him if she could. One for healing wounds done by a demonic blade and see if there was something that could remove celestial and demonic sigils. She agreed to do some looking, but he could tell from her voice that she didn’t think she was going to have any luck. 

He went back to Aziraphale’s side to check the IV drip and to make sure he was comfortable. He had miracled himself a chair next to the bed and had been reading Oscar Wilde. He picked the book up and sat down, sliding the bookmark over to reveal the last page he had been on. “But no fish at all was in it, nor any monster or thing of horror, but only a little Mermaid lying fast asleep. Her hair was as a wet fleece of gold, and each separate hair as a thread of fine gold in a cup of glass. Her body was as white ivory, and her tail was of silver and pearl…” 

He continued on until he fell asleep in his chair. This carried on day after day, check bandages, read, administer painkillers, call Anathema, read some more. 

There were other things he did while he waited as well, he removed all looking glasses from the flat and shop and made sure nothing could reflect his image. 

Aziraphale had removed the washroom from the blue prints, in order to extend his closet when he got the shop. There had been a bit of an argument with the contractors about that to be sure. 

So Crowley extended the space next to the closet and gave him a washroom. Complete with bath and shower. The room was basked in creams and tartan. Nothing was stark white and nothing was too dark, Crowley made sure everything matched his Angel. He looked at Aziraphale’s stomach, he didn’t know what was going on there, but knew Aziraphale would need to take care of it soon. 

* * *

It was three am, a month after they had returned, when Aziraphale woke up screaming. 

Crowley was right there next to him trying to calm him down. 

Aziraphale’s eyes were wild with fear. He wasn’t present, he was back in heaven being tortured. Knife digging into him, Gabriel fucking him, being beaten, gorged and his mind being wrecked. He was living it all at once, His hands were tearing about wildly. He needed out, he needed Crowley. 

Crowley tried to calm him, tried to reach him, but nothing worked. He let go quickly and put some morphine in the IV. He hoped it would help calm his love down. 

“Don’t touch me.” Aziraphale cowered into himself covering his face with his arms.

Crowley backed up and put his hand in front of him.

“It’s just me Angel. It’s Crowley.”

“Crowley? Where are you? I need you, Crowley. Please save me.”

Crowley's heart broke. He had been too late to save his Angel. He hoped that someday he would be forgiven.

It took a while, but Aziraphale fell back asleep, still confused as to where he was and who was with him. 

Crowley sighed with relief. He cried sitting there next to the bed. How was he going to help his Angel? He could help with the physical injuries, but the mental ones were going to be the hardest, and they may never heal.

For somebody's sake why had this happened to his Angel? Why hadn’t it happened to him instead. He just felt so useless. He remained awake and next to the bed for the next week so that he could make sure Aziraphale was safe to wake up. 

* * *

The next time Aziraphale woke he was more sedate. He looked over and saw Crowley staring at him. 

“You came.”

He cried as tears cut paths down his face. 

Crowley grabbed his hand 

“Of course I came, I just wish it had been sooner.” 

He lifted the hand and gave it a light kiss. He wanted to reach out to Aziraphale, but he didn’t want to hurt him. 

“Angel, we are free now. You scared the crap out of them.” Aziraphale looked at him confused 

“I what?” He tried to move, but cried out in pain. 

“No Angel, don't move.” Crowley gently took his shoulders and settled him back down. “You know when you hulked out.”

Aziraphale furrowed his brows 

“Hulked out?” 

Crowley sat back down, 

“Yeah when you took your true form as a Cherubim.” 

Aziraphale put his head back and looked at the ceiling. 

“I don’t remember that.” 

He breathed in as he shifted again, he looked down at his body. 

“Sorry for no clothes, I didn’t want to hurt you more.” worried Crowley. 

Aziraphale cried again at the state of his body, the sigils, the bandages, his extended belly. 

“Crowley I need your help.” 

He gritted his teeth and pushed up. 

“No no, Angel get back down.” Crowley tried to stop him. 

Aziraphale snapped “Crowley I need it out, I need your help, I need to do one thing to rid myself from them.” 

He looked at Crowley eyes pleading with the sorrow from his soul. 

Crowley sighed and found purchase on Aziraphale where no bandage was. 

“What can I do for you Angel?”

Aziraphale hissed past his teeth “I need to throw up,” he tapped his belly. “I need this out of me.” 

Crowley conjured a bucket for him. 

“Ok Angel here you go.” 

Aziraphale shook his head “No Sandalphon magicked me so I can’t bring it up.” His eyes looked hollow, “Please I need you to fix it back, please I need you to fix me back.”

Crowley snapped his fingers without a second thought and felt the magic disintegrate. 

At which Aziraphale grabbed the bucket and heaved. He heaved for what felt like and eternity for both of them. 

Crowley kept snapping the bucket clean each time Aziraphale came up for breath. 

Once he was finished Crowley cleaned him up and helped him lay back down. Tears stained his face and he looked at Crowley with pleading eyes 

“Don’t leave me, please don’t leave me.” 

Crowley grabbed his hand once more and brought it to his lips. 

“Never Angel. I will always be here for you.” 

Crowley administered another dose of morphine and Aziraphale closed his eyes. 

Crowley sat back in his chair and grabbed another book and read some more to his sleeping Angel.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter contains PTSD and mention of rape.  
> again please check out my wonderful beta reader, shesakillerqueen, works she has some great writings.

Anathema called Crowley after a few weeks and told him what she had found. 

“So did you have any luck?” Pleaded Crowley 

“Well yes, but no. I didn’t find anything about the sigils, sorry there isn’t much lore on those. I did find a spell that will heal Aziraphale.” She could hear Crowley getting excited “BUT it involved drinking the blood of an innocent child, which I don’t think either of you want.”

Crowley was crestfallen, he had hoped there was something, but agreed neither of them would be interested in that avenue in order to heal Aziraphales wounds from the demonic blade. 

“Thank you book girl.” 

Anathema chimed in. “I just wish there was something more that I could do.” 

Crowley shook his head at his phone. “No, thank you so much for all you have done.” He hung up the phone and turned around.

“Who was that?” Asked Aziraphale from the bed. 

“Oh it was nobody, just Anathema making sure you are OK.” Crowley half lied as he walked over to the bed. “Is there anything you want? Tea, cake? a book?” 

Aziraphale grimaced at the thought of any of those. 

“No I just wanna spend time with you… maybe…. maybe you could read some more for me?”

He hadn’t told Crowley yet what had happened to him, he just couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud yet, it would make it more real to tell Crowley.

* * *

It had been six months since he had brought Aziraphale back, and he was looking the worse for wear. 

He wasn’t eating or drinking anything and had started to look hollowed out. He hadn’t picked a book up and his eyes always looked empty. 

Crowley feared for him. Even with his skin healing, he hadn't gotten out of bed. 

He didn’t want Crowley to leave the room, but all he did was lay there, huddled in on himself. 

Crowley didn’t know what to do or how to help him, so he did the only thing he could do and that was read to the Angel. 

“It was the night before the day fixed for his coronation, and the young King was sitting alone in his beautiful chamber. His courtiers had all taken their leave of him, bowing their heads to the ground, according to the ceremonious usage of the day, and had retired…..”

* * *

Aziraphale laid there listening to Crowley read Wilde. He knew the book inside and out but Crowley's voice was very soothing. It was nice to focus on something other than the memories that plagued him. He knew he should talk to Crowley, but what would he say? Anything he said would break the demon’s heart and he couldn’t bring himself to do that. It was better if he kept it all to himself, but he also knew that he was hurting Crowley by keeping it too himself. He rolled his head over and looked at Crowley. But maybe, just perhaps it was time. He rolled over and pulled the book down. 

“Crowley, please come hold me. We need to talk.” 

Crowley's eyes went wide in shock. 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you Angel.” Aziraphale shook his head 

“You wont hurt me anymore than I have been. I need you Crowley, I need to tell you.” His eyes started to water. 

Crowley pet his head as he crawled onto the bed and wrapped himself around Aziraphale like the constrictor that he was. 

“Sssshhhhh ssshhhh sssshhh…. It’s OK. I’ve got you.” 

Aziraphale snuggled into Crowley 

“He raped me, Crowley. Gabriel raped me and forced me to swallow him. I don’t know why, he was always above such things. I don’t understand, why did he do that?” 

He kept on babbling for a few minutes just asking why as Crowley held him. 

Crowley's was glad Aziraphale couldn’t see his face because his eyes were flashing gold and he was grinding his jaw. He was going to kill Gabriel, he didn’t know how yet, but he was going to. He pet Aziraphale and just held him as he cried, he continued to hold him long after Aziraphale had fallen asleep. Crowley looked at his Angel, it looked like he was going to have to go through his ordeal one event at a time, for those that he remembered. He pulled Aziraphale closed and set his chin on the top of his head. So much had happened to him during such a short period of time, it would be a god send if he did remember all of it. Crowley wanted to know everything that had happened, but just looking at the physical damage, he didn’t think Aziriphale would be up to mentioning it at any time soon.

Aziraphale woke up the next morning and panicked. He didn’t know where he was and why there was pressure holding him down. He pushed and fought to get free panting as he started losing his breath.

Crowley was up and on the other side of the bed. “Ssshhh Angel, it’s OK it’s just me.” He put his hands in the air unthreatanly 

Aziraphale looked about wildly not seeing what was in front of him. He heard screaming and saw the glint of a knife, felt the searing pain of flesh being torn. He put his head in his hands and felt his nipples being torn off and saw his skin being eaten. He sank to his knees. The sounds of screaming reverberated in his ears. It was so loud it was deafening. A hand touched his shoulder and he scrambled away. ‘I must get away, I must escape, I must find Crowley.’ He curled up against the wall and continued screaming.

Crowley was at a loss. Aziraphale was screaming so loud his ears were bleeding, he didn’t know what to do. As he proved he couldn’t touch his Angel and he clearly wasn’t hearing his words. He wanted to reach out and hug him close, but that would send Aziraphale farther into his panic. ‘Tea what if he smells tea? He loves tea, maybe it will bring him back a bit?’ Crowley conjured a cuppa tea and wafted it under Aziraphale’s nose. 

“Here Angel some nice hot tea.” 

Aziraphales eye widened and he bolted past Crowley, the tea up smashing to the ground. He was running through the room and trying to get out. 

Crowley was so shocked the only thing he could think to do was to hug his Angel to keep him from running from the flat and to keep him from hurting himself. Crowley came up to Aziraphale and gently grabbed his hands, pulling him into a loving tender hug. He let his magpie wings out and wrapped them around them. Aziriphale still fought him, but Crowley held him firm.

“Shh Angel it’s just me. Come back to me my love. Come back and see you are safe. Please Angel, I beg you to come back.” He rocked them back and forth hugging Aziraphale trying to calm him down.

It felt like forever, but Aziraphle stopped screaming and just sat there shaking, eyes glazed over, not seeing the present. He remembered his flesh being taken from him and eaten, piece after piece of him. He hurled but nothing came out, he started dry heaving over and over and he could feel a tender hand on his back. 

“Sh Angel, it’s OK. You are safe.” 

Crowley rubbed slow circles over his back. He tries to look over his shoulder but heaves again.

“C-crowley p-please help me.”

Crowley held him tight and sent his wings back.

“Always my love, always.” He cradled his head in his lap and pet his soft blonde curls. Crowley picked Aziraphale up and carried him back to the bed. “Get some rest, luv. Dream of whatever you like best.” 

Crowley placed his hand on the side of Aziraphale’s head and the Angel fell fast asleep. He ran his hands over his face. 

“They really did a number on you angel. I will be here for you whatever you need. I will try to save you, even if it means saving you from yourself.” 

He kissed the angel and sat back down in the chair. “I will be right here for you Angel.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to Shesakillerqueen for the editing.
> 
> Sorry for the late post. I have shared custody of my daughter and share the summer one month each. So I was spending as much time as I could before my ex shipped her off to Vancouver Island for August. Been kinda a whirl wind and a bit depressing. Anyways sorry again.
> 
> Angst and tenderness.

Aziraphale woke to the feelings of love and kindness, smiling in contentment. That was until he moved and he felt the searing pain radiating through his body. Confusion racked his brain as he tried to sort out what was going on.

“Ssshh Angel, take it easy. You're safe.” Crowley reached out tentatively

“Crowley?” 

He reached an arm out to his demon and confusion creased his face as he saw the bandages on his arms and black writing covering most of his skin. 

“Crowley what happened? What is going on?”

“Angel do you not remember what happened to you?”

“I don’t know I remember flashes of things but they can’t be real.” He shivers “They can’t possibly be real.”

“I’m sorry Angel, but I fear it may all be real. Your brain is just trying to cope.” He said sadly “Would you like some tea?”

A flash of Sandalphone appeared behind his eyes and he felt like puking. He flung his arms forward to fend off the thought.

“NO!”

“Ok Angel no tea. Is there anything you want?” he asked tenderly

“Maybe a bath.” 

Crowley nodded and snapped his fingers filling the tub to the perfect depth and temperature and as a second thought he snapped again removing all mirrors from the loft. He didn't need Aziraphle having another freak out due to the state of his body. He snapped a third time to remove all the bandages covering Aziraphale’s body. Crowley picked him up and carried him to the bathroom and placed him gently in the tub. Not caring that his shirt became soaked.

Aziraphale closed his eyes and melted into the water letting out a sigh. He felt the sting across his body, but the flow of the water brought a slight bit of ease. He looked and his body, arms to toes, and he cringed. It was as if it was foreign like it wasn’t part of his body. He looked at Crowley.

“What happened?”

“I’m not fully sure what they did to you Angel, I was brought in at the end. But from what I can tell they raped you, skinned you, plucked your feathers and seared their sigils to your body. They may have done more, which I fully believe, but I don’t know what else they did my love.” 

He took a breath and looked Aziraphale in the eyes. 

“How are you doing?”

Aziraphale shook his head, trying to shake the sliver of thoughts free of his head. 

“I don’t know dear. I don’t want to remember, I guess I really don't want to know.” 

His eyes watered as he looked at Crowley. 

“Please don’t let me remember.”

Crowley ran his hands through Aziraphale’s curls.

“Shhh Angel, we will just have to take it one day at a time. Heck we can take it one moment at a time, there is no need to rush anything.”

He grabbed the cloth and gently ran it over the black parts of his skin.

* * *

Aziraphale woke one morning feeling better than he had in awhile. He looked over at Crowley who was cuddled into the bed next to him. All he wanted was for everything to get back to normal. He wanted to move on from all that had happened. He leaned down and kissed Crowley on the head.

“Mm morning Angel. How are you today?”

“I’m well dear boy, feeling a bit chipper.”

“Well that’s good. What do you have planned for the day?”

“I would like to try getting back to my old routine, I think that it might help. Read some books and have some hot cocoa.” 

Crowley rolled over a bit concerned “You sure you’re not going to push yourself? You have been doing so well.”

“I have to do something Crowley. I can’t just sit here in bed all day and pray that everything will go away.”

Crowley put his hand on Aziraphale’s “I know luv, but we don’t know all of what happened to you, I don’t want you getting triggered, you have been doing so well.”

“It’s ok dear, just a little light reading should do me good.” Aziraphale smiled at Crowley

Crowley patted his head and kissed him on his forehead.

“Ok Angel, just take it easy.” He slid off the bed and made his way downstairs to make the desired cup of cocoa. 

Aziraphale reached over and grabbed the book he had been reading before all this horribleness had happened. He opened to the page he was last on and confusion struck his face. Nothing made sense. The words ran together and spun in his head making him feel sick. He flipped through the pages panic rising. He grabbed another book from his night stand that the same thing happened. He jumped to the floor and rushed to the nearby bookshelf and started tearing through all the books. Tears welled his eyes. He couldn’t read a single book, not one. A flash of Uriel appeared behind his eyes.

“You will lose your ability to read and write words. More or less you will find your books nothing but a hindrance now” She had sneered at him.

Tears ran down his face as he rocked on the floor holding one of his beloved books.

Crowley came back up and dropped the cup of cocoa at the sight of Aziraphale.

“Angel, what’s wrong? What happened? Did you remember something else?”

Aziraphale looked at him with glossy eyes pleading with him.

“They took my books from me.” It was so light Crowley almost missed it.

“What do you mean they took your books from you? They are all right here.” He looked around confused.

Aziraphale choked back a sob

“They took my ability to read and write away from me.”

Crowley paled and reached out to hug his Angel. He felt sick, they did what? How could they? They knew how important it was to Aziraphale and he knew that was why they had taken it from him. He rocked his body with Aziraphale and soothed him as best as he could. He picked him up and carefully placed him back into bed. 

Aziraphale curled up and stared blankly into nothing.

Crowley looked at the scattered books and snapped his fingers to put them to rights and to clean up the spilt cocoa. He needed to come up with a plan to avenge his angel, they were not going to get away with this. He wished he could just snap his fingers to fix Aziraphale, but mind manipulation required fixing each synapse and untangling the mess Uriel had left behind. If he studied the brain and how it all worked, he might be able to fix the mess in Aziraphale’s poor brain. 

* * *

It was two weeks before Aziraphale moved from his spot on the bed.

Crowley had taken care of him as best as he could, he snuggled with him and comforted him. Brushed his hair, rubbed his back, held his hand anything he could think of to bring his Angel back to him. Crowley feared that Aziraphale was truly broken, but did everything to reach him. When he wasn’t spending time with Aziraphale he was reading every book he could think of regarding the brain and how things worked. He read book after book he read, he watched videos and called specialists. Every time he felt like he was making way, he found another pitfall.

He ran his hands through his hair. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy. To give himself small breaks through this time he would read books about living with someone with PTSD. He knew he needed to be careful and to treat Aziraphale with kid gloves, but the problem was neither of them knew what had fully happened to Aziraphale.

Aziraphale rolled over and found the other side of the bed was empty. He slowly sat up and called for Crowley.

Crowley was up the stairs in seconds and beside the bed holding his hand. 

“What do you need, Angel? Are you OK?” Crowley whispered. He was so worried that he would send Aziraphale back into another spiral.

Aziraphale gave a half hearted smile. 

“I am ok luv, it just took me time to grieve the loss of an important part of my life. I just don’t know what to do with myself now. It just feels like there is nothing left for me.”

Crowley looked crestfallen. “But what about me Angel, am I not worth living for?”

Aziraphale reached out to cradle his face “Oh dear boy you are the only one I live for.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to shesakillerqueen for her wonderful help in editing. Check out her stuff she has some awesome fics.
> 
> Thank you to all who have taken the time to read this fic. I know I'm not on a schedual for updates so thank you for sticking around.

The next few weeks they got into a quiet routine. Crowley would research in the mornings, while Aziraphale dusted and wiped down his shelves. 

In the afternoon they would curl up Crowley would read to Aziraphale from some of his favorite books.

The evenings were full of smiles and reminiscing about the past 6000 years.

Until one cool evening.

“Crowley I was wondering if you could help me drink a cuppa. I know it will trigger me, but I want to start to regain control of my life again.”

Crowley’s eyes went wide with concern, “But dear you are doing so well right now.”

“I know luv, but I need to do this and I know I can’t do this on my own.”

Crowley sighs and runs his hand through his hair. 

“For you Angel, anything.”

Crowley went and put the kettle on and they both waited anxiously. They jumped when it popped. With shaking hands Crowley put the mixture leaves into the pot and poured the steaming hot water into it. They waited nervously as the tea steeped. Taking a big sigh Crowley poured the tea into the white angel wing cup.

“Are you sure about this Angel?”

“Only one way to find out.”

He reached out with shaking hands. Pausing to steel himself. He gripped the cup and brought it towards his nose as he closed his eyes.

Pain cut through his stomach and he gagged. Images came flooding back as to what Sandalphone had done. He tasted the blood in his throat from the tube being shoved in. The drone of the blender sent shivers down his spine. He placed a hand on his stomach as he could feel it extending once more. The cup dropped and as his whole body shook. He opened his eyes.

“Crowley.” He whispered as he collapsed onto the ground.

Crowley leapt forward and caught Aziraphale before he reached the floor.

“It’s ok Angel, I gotcha.”

He picked Aziraphale up and carried him back up stairs to the bed.

“Here you go Angel”

“It’s ok, I’m ok.” Aziraphale wheezed 

“Can you tell me what happened Angel?”

“Just give me a minute.” He breathed in putting his hand out to stable himself. 

He felt strong arms wrap around him drawing him into a cocoon of love and safety.

“I remembered Sandalphone putting a tube down my throat and force feeding me all the things I liked so that I wouldn’t or couldn’t be able to enjoy them again.” He lowered his eyes as tears cut down his face “Well he sure managed to accomplish his goal, I can’t even have a cuppa.”

A hand circled his back. and Crowley whispered in his ear.

“It’s ok Angel. We just have to take it one step of a time.”

Crowley buried his head into his Angel's shoulder. He cringed at what they had done to him. ‘There has to be some way to get back at them for their transgressions. Maybe Anathema has some ideas. Maybe I can make a deal with Satan? I can just storm in and see how far I get. Something, anything, anything for my Angel.’

Aziraphale brought his legs up and curled up into Crowley's tender embrace.

“Thank you Crowley for always being there for me. For always rescuing me. For being my rock.” He looked up, eyes glistening. “Thank you for always loving me.”

“Ngk… Anytime Angel.” he kissed the top of his head, “but this time you saved me from harm Angel.”

“What do you mean?” He looked up into Crowley's amber eyes.

“Do you not remember? You went full on Cherubim and threatened heaven and hell, when they started slapping me around. You demanded that if they didn’t leave us alone that you would tear it all down around their ears.”

“But I haven’t had any of those powers for millennia. I have just been silly ol’ me.” Aziraphale said, puzzled.

He remembered when they had demoted him. They had placed a containment miracle on his heads and his wings, stripping him of his Cherubic power. Demoting him to a Principality, which he thought funny since he still had more power than an Archangel. All for what? Because he had wanted to save rebelling Angels from falling.

“Well Angel you were dripping with power and you scared Heaven and Hell. When you did they let me go and you brought us here…. Why did you never tell me that you were a cherubim?”

“I never saw the need. They sealed away that side of me, so it was as if I never was one.”

Crowley gasped, “Sealed your power away? They rarely do that…. What happened Angel?”

“I was a leader in the war of the fallen, and like you I did my duty. I struck down rebellious Angels. I struck down so many Crowley, I didn’t want to keep losing our brothers and sisters. I wanted us all to have peace, that maybe we could work it out. I tried to talk with both sides, I tried to make them see the chaos they were causing, to see how many of our siblings we were losing. They just wanted war, they just wanted to see us all divided. When it was all done and over they said I was a traitor and that only God could strip my of my wings and heads, but that they could seal them away. That I would forever be known as a Principality and as punishment I was to be sent to earth and guard the Eastern gate of Eden. And well you know the rest.”

Aziraphale took a shaky breath. and looked down at his hands turning them over as if seeing them for the first time.

“The seal must have broken when we were up there.” he said looking up at Crowley

Crowley shut his mouth and swallowed. “Angel I’m pretty sure you broke the seal when you saw that they were going to hurt me.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow thank you all so much for reading. 3 away from 3,000 is amazing. I hope you all like it. Sorry I'm not consistent with my updates. 
> 
> Again thanks to shesakillerqueen for beta reading this for me. She is awesome, go check out her works she has some great fics.

Crowley looked down at the Angel sleeping below him. Aziraphale always amazed him, but this was definitely new. How had he never known that his Angel had been one of the highest ranking Angels out there? There were only four of them, each had guarded the gates of Eden. Which makes sense why Aziraphale had been there, even if Aziraphale had just told him he had been on Apple tree duty. Their main job had been to guard God’s Holy presence from any sin or corruption. To have that stripped from Aziraphale, Crowley just couldn’t believe it. They had been fucking with his Angel for so long he was done with it.

Crowley reached over and put his hand on Aziraphales shoulder. Aziraphale turned his head.

“Angel I’m going to go out for a bit today OK? Will you be ok by yourself?”

Aziraphales eyes widened and his lower lip started to tremble 

“Must you?”

Crowley put a hand on his cheek. “Angel I know we haven’t been apart since the event, but there is something I must do. You will be safe, the place is warded twice over and I have installed my own security system. I will know the second someone entered the shop. I will snap back here in a second if you need me. Here..” 

He placed a chain around his neck with a button on it. 

“Click this if you need me for anything and I will be here in a blink. Trust me Angel. You will be safe, I just need a few hours.”

He leaned down and lightly kissed his Angel.

Aziraphale reached out and wrapped his arms around him. “Please Crowley, just be safe. I will try and sleep while you are gone so that I don’t feel the time pass. Not much else I can do.” He said a bit defeated. 

Crowley stood up and slowly made his way to the door. 

“It will be OK Angel, just remember how much I love you. You know I would do absolutely anything for you. Take it one breath at a time and I will be back before you know it.

He reluctantly walked through the door and shut it letting out a sigh. He didn’t want to leave Aziraphale, but he had to find a way to face those bastards and bring them down. He straightened his shoulders and sauntered out of the shop and to the witch's house.

* * *  
He reached Anathema's house in record time and walked through the front door without even knocking.

“Hey book girl where are you?” He looked around trying to find her.

Noise came from up stairs “Crowley what the hell is wrong with you? Knock next time would you.”

He started up the stairs towards her voice and the stair squeaked

“Don’t even think about coming up here. I will be down in a bit.”

He went and sat on the couch and waited for her, growling.

She came down the stairs looking a bit disheveled. Her clothes had been thrown on and her hair was wild, following her down the stairs was Newt.

Crowley groaned, “Ugh sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt.” 

Anathema just grinned at him, “No worries we can have another go at it later.”

Crowley shook his head “I didn’t need to hear that.”

“Well perhaps you should have knocked.” She smirked “So what are you doing here? I thought you would still be with Aziraphale. Is he even able to be left alone?”

“I don’t know but we have to find out somehow.” he sighed “I need some ideas. I need help thinking about ways to get back at heaven and hell. I need ideas on how to let them know not to mess with us. I want to leave a mark. Bring them down a notch.”

Anathema looked at him, her eyebrows furrowing. “I’m not sure what I can do, the last spell I tried to help you with didn’t seem to help. What are the ways you can harm each other? Just holy water and hellfire? or what about something else?”

Crowley rested his head on his head. “Yeah only hell fire and holy water.”

They tossed ideas back and forth for a while, but nothing good arose.

Crowley sat there thinking about his Bond movies and how he would be going in to get the bad guys using the tool Q would give him. “What if, what if I used a flamethrower and water gun to go all James Bond on them?” Crowley looked pleased with himself

Anathema laughed. “Sorry… But the image of that is hilarious.”

After thinking about it for a bit she replied. “I don’t see that it couldn’t work, but you would have to make sure the holy water is contained and won’t drip out to kill you. What about protection for you? Anything you can think of to make sure the pricks upstairs don’t just douse you?”

Crowley paused. “Well I still have my amour from the great war in heaven. I think that might work.”

Anathema nodded, “Well it sounds like we have the starlings of a plan.” 

There came a beep from Crowley's pocket. “I gotta run, thank you again.”

With a snap of his fingers he was gone.

Anathema turned to Newt, “Now how about round two.”


End file.
